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esskay
Digital storyteller, Photographic narrator, Hogwarts alum. In real life, I write things. I speak fluent sarcasm. I'm unintentionally funny. My favorite thing is food. Guac is life. I'm a fountain of the most random information. I'm pretty, only because it's weird to call oneself beautiful. I'm weird in all the good ways. I live in the greatest city on Earth. I was Sasha before Beyonce was schizophrenic. My life is stranger than fiction. But please, don't take my word for it. My pen is mightier than my sword. Instagram
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Tuesday, June 11, 2013 || 12:07 PM
Don't count your true friends on a bright sunny day, when the sky is blue and smiles come easily. Wait for a storm, when the clouds are dark and the day grows cold and laughter is not heard in your heavy heart. Then, when a friend comes and stands beside you and lifts your spirits to the sky and laughter is in your heart, you know that they deserve the name "friend"I've learned that not everyone in your life is a friend. But I'm also slowly learning that I have a lot more friends than I think. And although I know they're not perfect, sometimes I think they're angels that God sent specifically for me. That may sound crazy to some people because as far as they know, angels only exist as holy fairies that float around right above us, sprinkling holy water and doing God's bidding. And if that's what you believe, then that's cool too but I truly believe that angels walk amongst us. This past Sabbath morning, I was on my way to church and everything that could go wrong that morning, definitely did go wrong. I was super late, no money for a cab so I had to take the bus and then as I was rushing to the bus stop, I saw the bus leaving. I was so frustrated but I promised myself I wouldn't go home. The devil obviously didn't want me in church but I would make it my business to be there. So as I waited and waited and waited, I questioned God. "Why Lord? WHY couldn't you just hold the bus a few seconds longer? I've been standing at this stupid bus stop for almost half an hour and I'm already late! I could've been in church already!" blah diddy blah blah blah. And then I heard my mother's voice in my head "don't question God, He does everything for a reason" and then I rationalized that maybe He kept me off that bus for my own protection and then I got mad again because I knew that was stupid and I could've been in church already instead of standing in the sun, waiting for the bus. And then the bus came and I stopped talking to myself. On the relatively short walk from the bus to the church, I started feeling woozy and unsteady on my feet but I chalked it up the fact that I was wearing 5 inch heels and NYC has some screwed up streets. But then I got really unsteady and my vision started closing in on itself and I fell. A man who had been standing there with his friend ran over and helped me up, sat me down, got me some cold water and asked if there was anyone he could call or anywhere he could bring me. I told him no and that I was just going to church across the avenue so he walked with me, held my hand and was very patient when I got tired and had to stop. Finally, when we were across the street from the church, I couldn't walk anymore so he ran across the street to tell someone in the church. I decided to call my friend Anderson figuring that this wasn't my church so he would tell someone and they wouldn't know who he was talking about. Just as Anderson's phone went to voicemail, I looked up and saw his girlfriend Emma running out of the church. Long(er) story short: they got me hydrated, took me to the hospital, figured out the problem, solved it and I feel much better now. But I tell you this story because every time, every single time that I question God, He shuts me down and puts me in my place. If I had stayed home, I might've felt woozy and gone back to bed, thinking I was just very tired and not realizing that I was getting sick. But if I had caught the first bus that I missed, that nice man who, I'm starting to think is an angel, might not have been standing there at that time. Emma told me later that she was standing at the back of the church when he went and told her I wasn't feeling well and that she was the first person he spoke to. She didn't know why she was just standing there and she usually sits all the way in the front of the church but God put her there. God made it so that she was the first person he spoke to, one of the only people who know me and could help me. There is no one on the face of this Earth who can convince me that my God isn't real. I'm really thankful that He continues to show off in my life. The fact that I'm even alive is a blessing because I know that some of the things that I've been through, another person might not have made it. But mostly, I'm thankful for my angels. Keri is one of the most thoughtful people I know. Emma is one of the most selfless people I know. Anderson and Joel always make sure I know my worth. My Brooklyn Faith fam, my Laos fam and everyone who has been my rock, I love you all and I don't know what I'd do or where I'd be without you but I'm happy that God has made it so that I don't have to worry about it. Thank you for being my angels. Labels: friends and fam, in real life, personals, real life amazing, stranger than fiction |