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esskay
Digital storyteller, Photographic narrator, Hogwarts alum. In real life, I write things. I speak fluent sarcasm. I'm unintentionally funny. My favorite thing is food. Guac is life. I'm a fountain of the most random information. I'm pretty, only because it's weird to call oneself beautiful. I'm weird in all the good ways. I live in the greatest city on Earth. I was Sasha before Beyonce was schizophrenic. My life is stranger than fiction. But please, don't take my word for it. My pen is mightier than my sword. Instagram
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Sunday, March 28, 2010 || 9:01 PM
Wi th Easter right around the corner, everyone's talking about it and looking forward to it for their own different reasons. Super religious people just love any excuse to go on and on to anyone who will listen about their undying, borderline scary love for Jesus. If He was still alive, I have no doubt that they would stalk Him night and day, so devoted are they to their love for Him. Students are just looking forward to some time off from school. Corporate America is once again pimping us all, as they do on every holiday and the children just want candy and some QT with the Easter bunny. But here's the thing about the Easter bunny: he doesn't actually exist. Which begs the question; who the hell came up with the Easter bunny?? Why does there have to be a fictional character associated with Easter? Why not just celebrate Jesus dying and rising from the dead on the third day to save us all? That seems pretty friggin awesome to me. Jesus is one kickass dude. I think that's a sufficient enough thing to celebrate without throwing the Easter bunny (who DOESN'T EVEN EXIST) into the mix. And even if there has to be a fictional character associated with this holiday (which, let it be known, there doesn't) why a bunny? Last time I checked, bunnies do not lay eggs. Chickens lay eggs. Turtles lay eggs. Even fish lay eggs. I can't tell you the last time I saw a bunny lay an egg. Probably because it's never happened. So I really don't get the whole Easter bunny-Easter egg thing, that confuses me. I've obviously put a lot of thought into this. But while I was thinking about the Easter bunny, the other pointless fictional character associated with a major holiday (obviously) came to mind. That's right, I'm talking about santa claus. Santa has the whole world fooled and HE'S NOT EVEN REAL! But just think about it. Everyone thinks he's this jolly guy who's so great because he flies around the world in one night and gives everyone presents, when really, you people are looking at this all wrong. First of all, it's impossible to fly around the world in one night. HELLO?! Secondly…magical flying reindeer?? Can we please get real?! And third, he sees you when you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake? Santa is a big fat pedophile stalker crazy man! What great role models for our children: a freak of nature, e gg laying bunny and an obese pedophilic stalker. Then, the one holiday that deserves and awesome fictional character has none. What the hell happened to Halloween?? It just doesn't make sense that Christmas and Easter should have their own fictional characters and the one holiday designed for this kind of thing has none. The world is so backwards, I swear.Labels: babble and rant, pop of culture |