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esskay
Digital storyteller, Photographic narrator, Hogwarts alum. In real life, I write things. I speak fluent sarcasm. I'm unintentionally funny. My favorite thing is food. Guac is life. I'm a fountain of the most random information. I'm pretty, only because it's weird to call oneself beautiful. I'm weird in all the good ways. I live in the greatest city on Earth. I was Sasha before Beyonce was schizophrenic. My life is stranger than fiction. But please, don't take my word for it. My pen is mightier than my sword. Instagram
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Friday, September 21, 2012 || 8:18 PM
For those of you who are familiar with twitter hashtags, you probably have some idea of what this is about. For those of you who aren't, #him is just an obscure way of referencing one's significant other or the dude they're messing and/or chilling with. Now, facebook asked me what was on my mind and I felt like this was way too much to put on the book of faces so bear with me while I blog it out real quick.
I have a friend who's been on my mind a lot lately. He's not my #him but sometimes, I'd swear he could be. We've had this crazy flirtation going on for the last eight years and I could tell him anything. He's so sweet in his douchy way and thoughtful and one of the most hilarious people I know. And we curse each other out and get into it all the time but he is the only man who can talk to me a certain way because he's the only man who will get the little things and vice versa. So when I look at him and I look at myself, I often wonder what's stopping us. We have a friendship where we can talk to each other about any and everything. He's one of the few people I look at and see everything I want in a man. We look damn good together. What's the problem?
That's when I remember how so very dysfunctional we are. We're such bad friends to each other sometimes and it's never intentional. We're just not the best pair, despite all the other things. And that doesn't make us love each other any less, we just know our limits.
I guess I was just thinking how crazy it is that through all the other girlfriends/boyfriends (and various "others") and all the loss in both our lives, we've still been there and are as close as we are now. It may not seem crazy but thinking about how we met and became friends (another loooong story), it really is. It's just realizing that sometimes having a mutual like, or even love, isn't enough. And even though you can love someone even when you hate them, it's still not enough. But...it is something. I think the word I'm looking for here is "miracle".
Labels: babble and rant, friends and fam |